Fluffy Behavior 101
[Copyright Freeman and Sky Dancer, 2003-2004.
All rights reserved. Permission to repost or
otherwise distribute is granted provided the
essay is kept intact and this notice included.]
The question keeps coming up, "What makes someone
fluffy or a fluff-bunny?" The concept of "fluff-bunny"
is similar to "Twinkie" as used in many American Indian
communities: someone who either plays at the spiritual
practices or is serious about it but goes for
stereotypes and glitz rather than factual information.
Practicing any significant number of these characteristic
behaviors will be good and sufficient cause to label you
accordingly. These are from actual experience, but they
don't all apply to any one person - we hope. Several of
them seem contradictory; this doesn't appear to matter to
the people in question.
Note: if you find this list offensive, then you are
probably a classic fluffy. If you think we're being
unnecessarily confrontational with this, you may be right
(but see item 7). If you think we're picking on Wiccans,
maybe so; but we do know plenty of non-Wiccan fluffies
check out Wicca for the Rest of Us
http://wicca.timerift.net/
for other detailed views on the decadence of Wicca).
1. Claim to be practicing some really old path, but
don't put forth the effort to find out what people
actually did or believed on that path. Make stuff
up while claiming that it's how the ancients did it.
2. Ignore anything dark or threatening, even if
pretending to work with dark deities. Talk about
how your deity of choice is always good or always
right, or pretend your favorite dark goddess is
really just a misunderstood sweetie-pie.
3. Accept any kind of nonsense you're told by
another fluffy or read in some book with a crescent
moon on the spine. Alternatively, accept any one
source as definitive, no matter what those
tight-assed intellectuals think about it. And do
pass on whatever it is you think you know as though
you invented it.
4. Get all worked up at any kind of challenge
involving logic or fact. Only feelings really
matter. Disregard what others have to say if it
doesn't affirm what you already believe, whether
or not they can prove their claims.
5. Make a big point of being huffy at anyone who
doesn't take whatever you say at face value,
especially if they continue to present evidence
that disproves your claims, and declare that you
are finished talking about the subject because
"everyone is entitled to an opinion" and so your
opinion is just as good as anyone else's.
6. Emphasize loudly that people don't have the
right to make judgments about your words if they
don't know you very well offline. Regardless of
what you actually SAY, only your professed
motivations should matter to other people.
7. Avoid conflict at all costs, and jump into
other people's disagreements, even if you're not
directly involved, to try to get them to agree
for agreement's sake. Agree with other people
just to smooth things over, or even lecture them
on how they should just get along. If you
moderate a list or message board, delete any
messages that don't agree with you or that
present uncomfortable viewpoints.
8. Try to get others to refrain from using
profanity or stop talking about a subject
because it makes you uncomfortable; for example,
go to a clothing-optional event and then pitch
a fit if anyone opts to go fully or partially
nude.
9. Tell non-fluffies how horrible/non-spiritual
they are for not accepting all pagans, regardless
of how asinine their behavior might be; but be
sure to tell everyone at the drop of a hat that
you're Not A Satanist, whether they asked or not.
10. Be sure to complain frequently about
persecution, whether you've actually experienced
any or not. Extra points if you think someone
choosing not to do business with you is
"persecution" or if you repeat any form of the
"Burning Times" myth:
~ 9 million died
(or any number greater than about 40,000)
~ Those condemned as witches were Wiccans
(or any kind of Pagan)
~ People were burned at Salem
(try hanged and pressed)
You might want to check the Covenant of the
Goddess
http://www.cog.org/
website for a reasonable account of the
Witch Hysteria from a source with impeccable
Wiccan credentials, except that doing so might
be non-fluffy.
11. In conversation in person or otherwise,
always assume that the Wiccan Rede (or whatever
your code of honor happens to be) applies to
all Pagans. If mildly challenged on this, act
confused; if strongly challenged, go into Major
Evil Eye Mode and accuse the Rede-Infidel (who
OBVIOUSLY has no ethics whatsoever) of Satanism,
Crowleyism, or worse.
12.Presume to lecture others on any of the
Favorite Fluffy Topics:
~ Why Witchcraft is a Religion
~ Only Wiccans are Witches
~ What Real Witches (your definition) don't do:
hexes, spells for selfish purposes, animal
sacrifices (we're not like those awful Santerians
or Voodoo practitioners), sex magick, etc.
~ What Real Witches (your definition) MUST do:
be vegetarian/vegan, do charity work, recycle,
vote for Democrats, etc.
~ Why Magick should NOT be used to interfere with
another's Will or Karma - even by healing them
~ How the world was a happy, peaceful matriarchy
until those horrible men had to mess it all up
~ How ritual nudity, sex magick, and the scourge
are all in traditional Wicca only because Uncle
Gerald was a dirty old man, not because of any
actual value they might have
13. Insist that Wicca, or whatever your path is,
is whatever you make it, regardless of its history.
Demand respect for what you're doing even as you
trash the efforts of your precursors and insist
on calling the trash by the same name. Don't
bother renaming what you do, however loosely
based on the original form, because you want to
ride on the coattails of people who went before
and claim some sort of lineage regardless of
the lack of similarities between what they did
and what you do.
14. If your belief is "All Goddesses are One
Goddess" and "All Gods are One God" and ultimately
all deities are aspects of the One, use this as
an excuse to not bother learning about or working
with specific deities. Or, when you do call on
a Lord and Lady by name, mix and match any two
from any pantheons at any times.
15. Use a disability as an excuse not to check
your facts or learn anything new, or as an excuse
to engage in other fluffy behavior. Claim
persecution if anyone dares to suggest that
using a spell-checker isn't unreasonable even for
someone with a disability.
16. Sign your emails/posts "Namaste" or "Bright
Blessings" when the content of the message chews
someone out, insults, or otherwise contradicts
the salutation.
17. You can be lacking in all of the preceding
Fluffy Traits, but if you demonstrate this one,
you're in the Fluffy Club: Don't show any signs
of having been touched by divinity or ecstatic
experience. Many mainstream Christians sing
hymns as if they were laundry-lists, and everyone
accepts them, so that is what we want to do.
Look askance at people who actually get out of
themselves in ritual or celebration. Care
more about what society and/or your friends
think than what your deities think or whether
you are actually getting anything out of what
you do. Be sure not to do anything, even if
it would develop your path/abilities/insights,
that might possibly provoke disapproval or make
you lose face.
It should additionally be noted that this is not
a diatribe against people who simply haven't
learned much yet about paganism; it's about people
who refuse to have integrity in their path or to
use logic and critical thinking skills. The gray
matter in our skulls isn't just to fill up space;
it's a tool that should be used - OFTEN.
The distinction we make between newbie and fluffy
is precisely in terms of how they respond to
education. We encounter plenty of each kind.
The uneducable will more likely flare up at
anyone who presents the truth, because they have
already committed to "it's anything I want it to
be" as a guiding principle, whether we're talking
about history, theology, the practice of magick,
or whatever.
Why do we make such a big deal about fluffies?
We'd happily let it pass if they weren't so busy
trying to impose their fluffy values on the rest
of the community. The rabid fervor with which
they attempt to impose their flippancy on others
gives outsiders the impression that we're all
stupid, incapable of critical thinking skills,
and inconsistent. Quite frankly, we don't
appreciate that, and we don't appreciate being told
we need to behave in stupid, unthinking, and
inconsistent ways. So while you are certainly
entitled to believe whatever you wish, you don't
have a right to force it on us; but we do have a
right to call bullshit when we see it.
All rights reserved. Permission to repost or
otherwise distribute is granted provided the
essay is kept intact and this notice included.]
The question keeps coming up, "What makes someone
fluffy or a fluff-bunny?" The concept of "fluff-bunny"
is similar to "Twinkie" as used in many American Indian
communities: someone who either plays at the spiritual
practices or is serious about it but goes for
stereotypes and glitz rather than factual information.
Practicing any significant number of these characteristic
behaviors will be good and sufficient cause to label you
accordingly. These are from actual experience, but they
don't all apply to any one person - we hope. Several of
them seem contradictory; this doesn't appear to matter to
the people in question.
Note: if you find this list offensive, then you are
probably a classic fluffy. If you think we're being
unnecessarily confrontational with this, you may be right
(but see item 7). If you think we're picking on Wiccans,
maybe so; but we do know plenty of non-Wiccan fluffies
check out Wicca for the Rest of Us
http://wicca.timerift.net/
for other detailed views on the decadence of Wicca).
1. Claim to be practicing some really old path, but
don't put forth the effort to find out what people
actually did or believed on that path. Make stuff
up while claiming that it's how the ancients did it.
2. Ignore anything dark or threatening, even if
pretending to work with dark deities. Talk about
how your deity of choice is always good or always
right, or pretend your favorite dark goddess is
really just a misunderstood sweetie-pie.
3. Accept any kind of nonsense you're told by
another fluffy or read in some book with a crescent
moon on the spine. Alternatively, accept any one
source as definitive, no matter what those
tight-assed intellectuals think about it. And do
pass on whatever it is you think you know as though
you invented it.
4. Get all worked up at any kind of challenge
involving logic or fact. Only feelings really
matter. Disregard what others have to say if it
doesn't affirm what you already believe, whether
or not they can prove their claims.
5. Make a big point of being huffy at anyone who
doesn't take whatever you say at face value,
especially if they continue to present evidence
that disproves your claims, and declare that you
are finished talking about the subject because
"everyone is entitled to an opinion" and so your
opinion is just as good as anyone else's.
6. Emphasize loudly that people don't have the
right to make judgments about your words if they
don't know you very well offline. Regardless of
what you actually SAY, only your professed
motivations should matter to other people.
7. Avoid conflict at all costs, and jump into
other people's disagreements, even if you're not
directly involved, to try to get them to agree
for agreement's sake. Agree with other people
just to smooth things over, or even lecture them
on how they should just get along. If you
moderate a list or message board, delete any
messages that don't agree with you or that
present uncomfortable viewpoints.
8. Try to get others to refrain from using
profanity or stop talking about a subject
because it makes you uncomfortable; for example,
go to a clothing-optional event and then pitch
a fit if anyone opts to go fully or partially
nude.
9. Tell non-fluffies how horrible/non-spiritual
they are for not accepting all pagans, regardless
of how asinine their behavior might be; but be
sure to tell everyone at the drop of a hat that
you're Not A Satanist, whether they asked or not.
10. Be sure to complain frequently about
persecution, whether you've actually experienced
any or not. Extra points if you think someone
choosing not to do business with you is
"persecution" or if you repeat any form of the
"Burning Times" myth:
~ 9 million died
(or any number greater than about 40,000)
~ Those condemned as witches were Wiccans
(or any kind of Pagan)
~ People were burned at Salem
(try hanged and pressed)
You might want to check the Covenant of the
Goddess
http://www.cog.org/
website for a reasonable account of the
Witch Hysteria from a source with impeccable
Wiccan credentials, except that doing so might
be non-fluffy.
11. In conversation in person or otherwise,
always assume that the Wiccan Rede (or whatever
your code of honor happens to be) applies to
all Pagans. If mildly challenged on this, act
confused; if strongly challenged, go into Major
Evil Eye Mode and accuse the Rede-Infidel (who
OBVIOUSLY has no ethics whatsoever) of Satanism,
Crowleyism, or worse.
12.Presume to lecture others on any of the
Favorite Fluffy Topics:
~ Why Witchcraft is a Religion
~ Only Wiccans are Witches
~ What Real Witches (your definition) don't do:
hexes, spells for selfish purposes, animal
sacrifices (we're not like those awful Santerians
or Voodoo practitioners), sex magick, etc.
~ What Real Witches (your definition) MUST do:
be vegetarian/vegan, do charity work, recycle,
vote for Democrats, etc.
~ Why Magick should NOT be used to interfere with
another's Will or Karma - even by healing them
~ How the world was a happy, peaceful matriarchy
until those horrible men had to mess it all up
~ How ritual nudity, sex magick, and the scourge
are all in traditional Wicca only because Uncle
Gerald was a dirty old man, not because of any
actual value they might have
13. Insist that Wicca, or whatever your path is,
is whatever you make it, regardless of its history.
Demand respect for what you're doing even as you
trash the efforts of your precursors and insist
on calling the trash by the same name. Don't
bother renaming what you do, however loosely
based on the original form, because you want to
ride on the coattails of people who went before
and claim some sort of lineage regardless of
the lack of similarities between what they did
and what you do.
14. If your belief is "All Goddesses are One
Goddess" and "All Gods are One God" and ultimately
all deities are aspects of the One, use this as
an excuse to not bother learning about or working
with specific deities. Or, when you do call on
a Lord and Lady by name, mix and match any two
from any pantheons at any times.
15. Use a disability as an excuse not to check
your facts or learn anything new, or as an excuse
to engage in other fluffy behavior. Claim
persecution if anyone dares to suggest that
using a spell-checker isn't unreasonable even for
someone with a disability.
16. Sign your emails/posts "Namaste" or "Bright
Blessings" when the content of the message chews
someone out, insults, or otherwise contradicts
the salutation.
17. You can be lacking in all of the preceding
Fluffy Traits, but if you demonstrate this one,
you're in the Fluffy Club: Don't show any signs
of having been touched by divinity or ecstatic
experience. Many mainstream Christians sing
hymns as if they were laundry-lists, and everyone
accepts them, so that is what we want to do.
Look askance at people who actually get out of
themselves in ritual or celebration. Care
more about what society and/or your friends
think than what your deities think or whether
you are actually getting anything out of what
you do. Be sure not to do anything, even if
it would develop your path/abilities/insights,
that might possibly provoke disapproval or make
you lose face.
It should additionally be noted that this is not
a diatribe against people who simply haven't
learned much yet about paganism; it's about people
who refuse to have integrity in their path or to
use logic and critical thinking skills. The gray
matter in our skulls isn't just to fill up space;
it's a tool that should be used - OFTEN.
The distinction we make between newbie and fluffy
is precisely in terms of how they respond to
education. We encounter plenty of each kind.
The uneducable will more likely flare up at
anyone who presents the truth, because they have
already committed to "it's anything I want it to
be" as a guiding principle, whether we're talking
about history, theology, the practice of magick,
or whatever.
Why do we make such a big deal about fluffies?
We'd happily let it pass if they weren't so busy
trying to impose their fluffy values on the rest
of the community. The rabid fervor with which
they attempt to impose their flippancy on others
gives outsiders the impression that we're all
stupid, incapable of critical thinking skills,
and inconsistent. Quite frankly, we don't
appreciate that, and we don't appreciate being told
we need to behave in stupid, unthinking, and
inconsistent ways. So while you are certainly
entitled to believe whatever you wish, you don't
have a right to force it on us; but we do have a
right to call bullshit when we see it.
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