HOW ABOUT THEM COWBOYS!!!!! humor dallas cowboys football jokes



I.

      Albert Einstein arrives at a VCA party and introduces himself to the first person he sees and asks, "What is your IQ?" to which the man  answers, "241."  "That is wonderful!," says Albert. "We will talk about the Grand Unification Theory and the mysteries of the Universe.
We will have much to discuss!"

      Next Albert introduces himself to a businesswoman and asks, "What is  your IQ?" She sez: 125 or so.  Responds Albert. "We can discuss politics and current affairs. We will have much to discuss!"

      Albert goes to a person in a big hat and asks, "What is your IQ?" to which the man answers, "51."  Albert responds, "How 'bout them Cowboys?"

II.

A lady in Dallas calls 911. When the officer answers the phone the woman is hysterical and tells the cop that a man has just  broken into her home and she thinks he intends to rape her. The officers explains that they are extremely busy at the moment and tells her "Just get the guy's jersey number and we'll get back to you."

III.

A news reporter was sitting in Central Park on his lunch  break. There were two teenage boys throwing the football around. A huge Rottweiler gets loose from it's owner and pounces on one of the boys. The other one, in a fit of panic, picks up the biggest stick he could find and smashes it against the dog's head, killing it. The reporter runs over to the boys. "Wow! That was great! I can see the headline now: "Giants Fan Saves Life of Best Friend!" "I am not a Giants fan", the boy replied. "Well, who are you a fan of, then?" asked the reporter. "I am a fan of America's Team, the Dallas Cowboys!". The next day, the headline read "Redneck Punk Brutally Slays Beloved Family Pet".

IV.

Dallas Cowboy Football team jokes. (DUH)

Q: What do you call 47 people sitting around a T.V. watching  the    Super Bowl?
A: The Dallas Cowboys.



Q: How many players did the Cowboys dress for their last
   game?
A: 22, the rest dressed themselves.

Q: What's Jerry Jones' biggest concern?
A: Does Bail Money count against the Salary Cap?

Q: What do you call a drug ring in Dallas?
A: huddle

Q: Four Dallas Cowboys in a car, who's driving?
A: The  police

Q: Why can't Michael Irvin get into a huddle on the field anymore?
A:  It is a parole violation for him to associate with  known felons.

Doctors say because of Michael Irvin's broken clavicle, it will be 6-8 weeks before he can videotape a teammate having sex.

I understand Chicago is trying to sign Michael Irvin. They got rid of the refrigerator, so now they want a coke machine.

The Dallas newspapers reported yesterday that Texas Stadium is going to take out artificial turf because the Cowboys play better on "grass".

The Dallas Cowboys adopted a new "Honor System". Yes, your Honor; No, your Honor.

The Cowboys had a 12 and 5 season last year. 12 arrests, 5 convictions.

Cowboys knew they had to do something for their  defense, so they hired a new defensive coordinator: Johnny Cochran.

Q: How do the Dallas Cowboys spend their first week at spring  training?
A:  Studying Miranda Rights.

Q: What's the difference between a Cowboys fan and a baby?

A:  Eventually the baby stops whining.

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